An Effing Foodie

Summertime, Sausage and Pepper Sliders, and Nanny's Cucina!

Just as mangoes in Hawaii have ruined mangoes from anywhere else for me, the bulging beauty of East Coast tomatoes have made boxed-still-green supermarket tomatoes a bitter pill to swallow.

That said, I generally prefer to melt down fresh tomatoes for sauce, deferring to whole canned kind when the freshies are looking wan.  Occasionally I'll dip into tomato paste when I'm looking for a hit of sweetness, color, and depth in whatever I'm making.  Even though I do keep it around, I find that I hardly ever use prepared tomato sauce.

But...that may change!  An always-in-the-know food friend of mine was kind enough to point me in the direction of Nanny's Cucina Marinara. 

Handmade in small batches from roma and grape tomatoes, this deeply red sauce has a glossy patina, pleasing, slow-cooked sweetness, and a bit of a spicy bite-back that beats the pants off your run-of-the-mill jarred marinara.  It's like sticking a finger into an old-school Sunday Dinner.

Prepared food goblins can step off--The Sauce is a great example of a flavorful time-saver, made only from ingredients you can pronounce. (That, and it just plain tastes better than anything a mere mortal could pull off on a weekday.)

Regina, I think you've done your Nanny's recipe proud--witness, Sausage and Pepper Sliders made possible--nay, scrumptious!--by your lovely sauce.

 

>CHOMP<

Alas, The Sauce isn't available in stores yet, but you can order it online via Nanny Cucina's site, where there's also recipes and some great family photos, too!

What's next for Nanny's?  A yet-spicier Arrabbiata Sauce and their version of Puttanesca, pegged All About Olives...can't wait!

These Are a Few of My Faaavorite Things: Lox Benedict, Avi and David's, NYC

Being workaholic midtown bachelors, The Effing BroBros eat a lot of takeout. SeamlessWeb has a vested interest in keeping the EFB hungry and unwilling to cook.

And anyone who's trolled around on their lunch hour knows, there's a plethora of crap food in Manhattan's ramming-speed midsection.  SeamlessWeb may offer enough midtown delivery choices to make the heartiest glutton blush, but I'd venture to say about 70% is not worth eating, much less getting gouged over.

So, when the BroBros stumble over a restaurant that delivers more than condensation-soaked lies, they're uber-loyal repeat customers.  One Sunday morning fixation of theirs is Avi and David's Kosher Bagels.

(Single-subject-porkaphiles, step off now.  See you soon!)

I know, I know, Avi and David aren't on the consecrated list of what's-what in bagel lingo (i.e. they're not Zabar's or Murray's).  But they are marvelously consistent, with real homemade food that meets the standards of God's Chosen People!

We've been well-pleased by their standard-issue stuff--Challah French Toast with Berries, Bagels-with-a-Schmear--but on a recent lazy Sunday, an Effing BroBro and I opted to branch out and order some house specialties.

We were a little perplexed and mecha-intrigued by the description of "David's Bagel Lox Benedict" ($9.99): Toasted Bagel or Bialy, Nova-Scotia Salmon, Over Easy Egg with Scallion Cream Cheese, Garnished with Bermuda Onion.

Scallion cream cheese AND a oozy egg AND smoked salmon?  It had to be kosher, but it didn't sound kosher.

Lovin' in the LES: BaCorn @ Roni Sue's Chocolates, Pancake Month @ Clinton St. Bakery, NYC

Accursed holiday conventions aside, my ever-so-patient man deserves treats.  (Nope, this is not mushiness--this is an admission of guilt on the part of an irrational, food-crazed unladylike-type.)

So if the V-Day makes it easier for The Man to get his comeuppance, then HURRAY!

Enter Roni Sue's Chocolates...yup, I wrote about them last Valentine's, too, but if it ain't broke, don't fix it. 

Where else are you going to find 6 handmade truffles for $10 (or $2 a piece, $18 for 12 pc, $22.00 for 15 pc), honey-and-tea lollipops ($1.50 each), or the CrackerJack™-cum-pig creation, BaCorn ($5 a bag)?

A $5-bag that goes WAY TOO QUICK, in my humble opinion; molasses-y popcorn that's not too sweet, with a scattering of chile-seasoned pine nuts and candied nuggets of bacon (of which there were too few, sayeth The Man--in a positive way, not a I'm-feeling-deprived way).  Love means being unembarrassed about your yen for candied pork.

The Man was tickled about the truffles I'd picked out too; no snoozy or overly fancypants fillings here, RS is willing and ably embracing chocolate-minded booze hounds.

L to R, top row then bottom: Dark-n-Stormy (ginger and rum), Manhattan (Knob Creek bourbon, sweet vermouth, bitters & a cherry), Chocolate-Covered Pretzel Caramel, Portly Fig (dried figs infused with Port wine), Pomegranate (Poma liqueur), and one Three-Layer Hazelnut Truffle (Dark, white & milk chocolates, each mixed with hazelnut praline).

Ladies and gentlemen, singles and couples, that's a lotta love for $10.

But what if you're not the candy-buying type?  What if an eyelid-sagging, satisfying brekky says l'amour to you?

Well, it's Pancake Month over at Clinton St. Bakery, and in honor of forced seasonal intimacy, on Feb. 13th and 14th, the special featured pancakes will be decked in Strawberries and a Champagne Zabayon.  I hate waiting in line for food more than your average chowhound, but the Clinton St. pancakes...they do something to me.  Check out the chocolate-chunk specimen ($12) that I shared with the Soft-Spoken Feisty Lady!

 

Tender, moist, studded with bittersweet chocolate, these somehow managed to be indulgent but not cloying.  We were sad to see them disappear so quickly (but happy to be the lucky co-culprits).  Pancakes are usually something SSFL and I avoid--I'd rather Benedict than have to soak dry disks of dough with liquid sugar to make them palatable--but these babies didn't even need the warm syrup doodad (butter rum?) off to the side.  Yes, yes, a thousand times, YES!

And speaking of Benedict, they managed to churn out an off-the-hook variation of that, too:

 

'Twas another special of the day, the Corn-and-Clam Fritter Benedict ($15).  It's as exactly as dirty as it sounds--hot hush puppies with chopped clam and corn topped with poached eggs and an Old-Bay spiked hollandaise.  Though I couldn't really taste any clam besides a welcome hint of brininess, and the eggs were done a little hard (medium, no oozy yolks) it was still damn good, and went perfectly with the pint-o-peppery Bloody Mary ($9). 

Plate-licking most certainly crossed our noggins, but somehow SSFL and I managed to show some restraint. 

But YOU won't have to! 

**Wink** 

Stuff It, Stockings: Emergency Effing Presents!

Tick-tock!  By now, friends/drinking buddies/loose acquaintances/clients/distant relatives have made their way out of the woodwork to pounce on your unsuspecting, holiday-bewildered self, and good 'ol standards and practices dictates that they must each get a well-thought-out bauble...or bottle. 

So, here's a list to ease the effing way!

For the sweet folk:

Bee Raw Honeys: Unpasteurized, single-variety honeys that will make you grateful for myopic, monogamous bees.  Try the frosting-like, buttery Sweet Yellow Clover or Star Thistle on toast (or better yet, biscuits!), the rich-n-tangy Wild Raspberry drizzled on blue cheese, or the darkly funky Buckwheat in your gingerbread or oatmeal.

Can't choose/commit/decide? No worries, for those who've been VERY good, they offer varietal variety packs! 

Need sweets more pimpin', less hippy? Yarra Valley Truffle Honey is a half-step from liquid gold, making it ridiculously easy to look like a cheese plate genius. 

(If you're in NYC, Murray's carries both Bee Raw and Yarra Valley honeys--the selection varies, but I've seen Bee Raw at Dean & Deluca, Whole Foods, and the Food Emporium as well!)

For the cheese nerds and otherwise cheese-curious:

Invite a friend out for a night of queso-based bonding with Murray's cheese classes (with an emphasis the booze-oriented ones); you can brush up on the basics, learn a thing or two about bourbon pairings (like the one I went to!) or expand your knowledge of all things stinky.

(By the by...I am currently not and have never worked for Murray's...all this super-schillin' merely demonstrates how pathetically dependent I am on them for tokens of good tidings and moments of personal indulgence.)

For those in need of a more potent yuletide fix:

Compass Box Whiskey: Sorry kids, these are not single-malt, but vatted malt (i.e., blended) Scotch whiskeys--don't let the lack of trendiness deter you, though.  The Peat Monster is a great find for all the gruffed-voiced loves in your life; the almost floral Hedonism and Asyla will help to ease the Scotch-uninitiated; and winter nights are that much cozier with Orangerie and a square or two of dark chocolate. 

Four Roses: No need to cross an ocean for solid brown booze--described as a "high-rye" bourbon, Four Roses has a spicy, fruity complexity that was practically made for spiking eggnog and dipping Grandpa's dentures.

Christmas Came Early! Murray's Bourbon and Cheese Pairing Class, West Village, NYC

When I saw "Bourbon and Cheese" on Murray's Cheese Class Schedule, I couldn't click fast enough. 

If my loved ones were forced to stage an intervention on my behalf, it would probably have less to do with sweet, sweet booze, and more to do with stinky, stinky cheese.

As much as I enjoy gnawing and cataloging my way through Murray's Everest o' Queso on my own, nothing lights me up quite like Murray's classes.

Yes, there is booze AND cheese.  But more importantly, most of us aren't born with an intrinsic knowledge of which boozes and cheeses were meant to be together, and Murray's classes have stepped in to reduce the guesswork of pairing.

The fantabu-rrific cheese empath, Nora Singley (formerly of Murray's and currently cooking in Martha Stewart's test kitchens), and overall-clad LeNell Smothers (Brooklyn/'Bama's own bourbon expert and spunky purveyor of spirits), presided over the merry marriage of congealed curd and brown booze with wit, ease, expertise, and bawdy tales.

Stuck on the idea of bourbon and cheese together?  To be fair, it is a matter of taste; if you favor, say, white wine spritzers and mild cheeses, these pairings may be a hard sell.  For me, I tend to heart the rankest of the rank, cheeses that are tough to pair with wines, ports and sherries--so bourbon and scotch pairings seem like the next logical step.

Super-Expressive Foods: ChikaLicious Dessert Club's Espresso Ice Shot

I'd like to think I'm slowly getting better at taking appetizing piccies of eats, to ultimately provoke the lot of you into mid-day, mid-cubicle hunger.

But I still end up with 'lil beauties...

<====like this fella.

BEHOLD, the Many-Eyed Affogato Monster! BLAUGH!!!

Be kind.

He's a little misunderstood...and apparently, as curious about you as you are of him!

More importantly, he's darned tasty! Billed as "Espresso Ice Shot", Many-Eyed Affogato Monster is a caffeine-bathed balm on your summer-sapped senses--vanilla bean soft serve, chocolate-coated crispies, and a shot of espresso.

He's a bit heavy on the soft serve to be affogato proper, but if you want less ice cream, I'm sure the affable (if overwhelmed) purveyor of sweets would be happy to oblige.

You'll find him at the ChikaLicious Dessert Club (right across the street from the original ChikaLicous Dessert Bar on E 10th St) in the company of some good-lookin' cupcakes (including an INSANE toasted-marshmallow-topped s'mores specimen), cookies, puddings, smoothies, and a rotating sorbet.

Treats for Grown-Ups: Apricot and Pistachio Nougat Roll-Ups

I'm finding as I get older, my sweet tooth keeps diminishing in size, and I'm more prone to favor the savor. (Vegemite-enriched Cup-of-Soup with Saltines, anyone?)

Somewhere in my mid-twenties, I mutated from someone with an ice-cream eating disorder into a quesophile; I stopped seeking out cake at gatherings (and gatherings solely for the sake of cake); I won't drink cola unless there's a bunch of Jack in it.

So when I recently brought a friend from Hawaii to the sweets counter at Dean & Deluca, I wasn't really on the lookout for personal pleasure.  But amid the heaps of prettily-wrapped premium confections, these little fellas caught my eye:

Cheery, no?  The packaging wasn't particularly informative--they were labeled as "bulk miscellaneous candy", with no ingredients or names for the product / producers / distributors.  (Um, is that legal?)  But it was pretty clear that it was nougat studded with pistachios, wrapped with a fruit puree that was likely apricot or orange.

People, if you see these, snatch them up immediately!  The nougat was feather-light yet gooey-sweet, ingeniously counterbalanced by acidity of the fat, toothsome apricot band of fruit roll-up in every bite.  They're not cheap--$6.66 for 6 individually wrapped 2-inch pinwheels (the DEVIL'S CANDY!)--but you could do a lot worse in D&D's hallowed halls.

If you're allergic to stone fruit or just plain don't like apricots, they sell the nougat on its own, too. 

Alas, they are not available online, and I can't vouch that they're at every D&D location, but they were definitely at Madison and 85th--so get yourself a bag, and wander through Central Park all hopped up on sugar and springtime.  

Caravane Camelbert: Camel-Milk Cheese in NYC!

You know you want some.

One particularly drunken, lactose-loaded night, my friend Heathie and I mused on all the cheeses we've yet to try, and tip-toed right into the fanciful: Seal cheese!  Pig cheese!  Camel cheese!

Turns out, some fanciful wishes are more easily fulfilled than you'd think.  Camel cheese has hit our shores, people!

The cheese, known to some admirers as Camelbert, has had a difficult time clearing regulatory hurdles in the European Union. But with the help of Gary Guthrie, an American importer, it has received a green light here. About 100 pounds of Caravane will be available in New York beginning this week at some Garden of Eden stores, Sahadi's, Stinky Bklyn, Zabar's and Todaro Brothers.

--PERVAIZ SHALLWANI, NYT

Camelbert is in the style of its conceit, camembert, with a bloomy-rind and a rich, creamy center.  At $30 a pound, it's a bit of a splurge, but if you can swing it, swap it for brie on your next cheese plate, and cross off another milk-bearing animal in your ongoing cheese conquest.

Holy Jameson Cupcakes, Batman!

I hope everyone had a rainbow St. Paddy's Day, and weren't hurting too badly on Tuesday...

(You've never really lived until you've heaved in the office.)

I wish I'd heard about this BEFORE St. Paddy's, but Babycakes--the celebrated vegan bakery down in the LES--makes cupcakes spiked with Jameson Whiskey in honor of the Irish!  Thanks to my fabu friend Cin (AKA The Office Alpha Asian) I was a lucky recipient of such a cupcake:

Isn't she a beaut'?

The frosting is cream cheese-y cloak for the very moist, discernibly boozy crumb of the cupcakes; as with all of Babycakes treaties, it was IMPOSSIBLE to discern that it was vegan.

Hushed whispers in the background: It's black magic! WITCHERY, I tell you!

As you've probably gathered by now, I'm not a lady who would take the omission of dairy very lightly, particularly when concerning baked goods.  But trust me, these babies could hold their own against any in the onslaught of sugary indie cupcakes.

Unfortunately, the Jameson cupcakes are not part of the regular Babycakes lineup, but I'm told that if you are super-savvy, you can order them in advance for a special occasion (just give the gals at least 3 days notice).

And if you're feeling a little less savvy, just trot on down and get yourself a box of the regulars: carrot, red velvet, chocolate and vanilla, all available in spelt or gluten-free (Dear Lord, there's a phrase I'd never thought I'd be typing).

Sweets for the (Mostly!) Sweet

This'll come as no surprise, but I'm not a big fan of Valentine's Day.  It's a day wrapped in chalky candy, smug couples, sub par pre-fixe fare, and flammable fuschia plush.  Blechy.

But to be fair, there are fantabular, long-suffering significant others out there who have more than earned a little bit of spoilage (that's men AND womenfolk!), even if it IS inspired by mass-motivated guilt.

So pay attention, 'cause even if you boycott V-Day, some of these treaties may be worth saving for the random day you're overcome with gratitude for the poor brute that puts up with you.

(Or the random day you have to dig yourself out of the doghouse. Whichever comes first.)

--------------------------------------

If you're mui-crafty, have freezer space + a sweetie with a sweet tooth:
Frozen olive oil and chocolate lollipops--SO pretty, relatively easy, and there are few combinations on earth sexier than chocolate and olive oil (from the gorgeous blog delicious:days).

If you're mui-crafty, have a way with yeast, deep-fat frying + a sweetie with a sweet tooth:
Homemade miniature rose-hip jam doughnuts--this takes a little more know-how, but everything tastes better with jam and powdered sugar. Wink-wink. (Also from delicious:days.)

If for you, candy means buying, and your sweetie is currently diseased:
Soothe and indulge with spiced tea and honey lollipops from Roni-Sue's Chocolates at the Essex Street Market (via Time Out New York).

If for you, candy means buying, and your sweetie is a lushy cocoaphile:
How 'bout a box of Margarita, Dark-n-Stormy, and Portly Fig truffles, also from Roni-Sue's Chocolates at the Essex Street Market (via NY Daily News).

If you're having a hard time choosing between posh candy and character-driven jewelry:
Jewel-toned, hand-pulled candy rings from Papabubble are whimsical, lusciously fruity, and go a long way to prove the hipness of hard candy (via Time Out New York).

If nothing sounds better than close quarters and hot cocktails:
Double Stefan Trummer's heady Winter Sangria recipe, put together a cheese plate, and enforce a Blackberry ban (via NY Mag).